humanities.lit.authors.shakespeare

On 19 Feb., 20:51, Pauline wrote:
> Hello I am new to this place so please don't yell at me or make
> smartremarks, I don't like smartremarks. I have a learning disability
> and I am supposed to study this because my teacher said study it.
>
> Did Poole write Ttus Andronicus?
>
> That's what my teacher said to study, Did Poole write Ttus Andronicus?
>
> Those romans had funny spelling, haha.
>
> I don't think Poole wrote Ttus Andronicus because MR. Poole does
> not write well.
>
> and call this war The Battle of Alcazar
>
> too many syllables!
>
> His brethren thus in fatal bed behearsed,
> His father's brother of too light belief
> This negro puts to death by proud command.
> Say not these things are feigned, for true they are,
> And understand how eager to enjoy
> His father's crown this unbelieving Moor
> Murdering his Uncle and his brethren.
>
> No imagilation there!
>
> When Mr. Poole has Edward one come home from war,
> he says this about his dead relatives:
>
> Take comfort madam, leave these sad laments
> Dear was my uncle, dearer was my son
> And ten time dearer was my noble father,
> Yet were their lives valued at a thousand worlds,
> They cannot escape the arrest of dreadful death
> Death that doth seize and summon all alike.
>
> Hamlet
> Had I but time--as this fell sergeant, death,
> =A0 =A0 =A0 =A0 Is strict in his arrest--
>
> See, Mr.Saakspere uses his imagilation and Mr. Poole doesn't!
> Death is a "fell seargent", death is just death to mr pppoole.
>
> Look at what Mr. Ttus says in the same sitchooayshun:
>
> Romans, of five and twenty valiant sons,
> Half of the number that King Priam had,
> Behold the poor remains, alive and dead!
> These that survive let Rome reward with love;
> These that I bring unto their latest home,
> With burial amongst their ancestors.
> Here Goths have given me leave to sheathe my sword.
> Titus, unkind, and careless of thine own,
> Why suffer'st thou thy sons, unburied yet,
> To hover on the dreadful shore of Styx?
> Make way to lay them by their
> brethren.
> There greet in silence, as the dead are wont,
> And sleep in peace, slain in your country's wars.
> O sacred receptacle of my joys,
> Sweet cell of virtue and nobility,
> How many sons hast thou of mine in store
> That thou wilt never render to me more!
>
> See how much more imagilation there is there, "hover on
> the dreadful shore of Styx", "sweet cell of virtue
> and nobility" and all the other thots!
>
> Mr. T says:
>
> These are their brethren, whom your Goths beheld
> Alive and dead; and for their brethren slain
> Religiously they ask a sacrifice.
> To this your son is mark'd, and die he must
> T' appease their groaning shadows that are gone.
>
> "groaning shadows" what a weird vocabulary Mr. Ttus had!
>
> But my teacher says that Mr. Vikkers says that Poole
> wrote Ttus, and Mr. Vikkers is a knight now and we have
> to believe him. I like knights! Here is a page with some
> knights
>
> http://kevin.lps.org/Middle_ages/castles/weapons/knight.html
>
> Pauline

Uhmmmmmmmmm.

Dear Pauline,
I promise I won't yell at you, I'll just SHOUT! and I
won't make any smart remarks, just dumb ones, okay?

Now my question.

ARE YOU FOR REAL?!!!

That was shouting, you see. Don't cry, or I'll do it again.
My son will tell you, I'm an awful mother.
He's a great son, though.
But I'm a real meanie.

So. I'm gonna tell you something, Pauline.
I mean, excuse me, but this itty-bitty cutesy-wootsie
talk of yours won't wash.

First of all, I'm the rotten spellar heyar. So I resent your
cummin haire an tryin to tacke mai playce, gett it?

Second of all, Pppppauline, people with learning disabilities
don't ask the kinda qwestshuns u duu.

And what's this rot about your teacher being a knight?
Sir Vickers?

Well, I'm Sir Lancelot, and NOT impressed.

You're faking, Milady - or Milord.

So 'fess up, lassie, and uncloak thyself.

RT